Misc. Article

The Transportation Security Administration.  Wow!  What a wonderful use of our tax dollars!  An agency specifically designed to: "protect the Nation's transportation systems to ensure freedom of movement for people and commerce."  Essentially, this is an organization that completely defeats it's own mission by being "politically correct".  Their motto should be "Our mission is to defeat terrorism by not offending anyone, and preventing any form of water and/or deodorant from entering any form of public transportation."

After the tragic events of 9-11, I was willing to give up some freedom for the extra bit of security it would provide.  Unfortunately, my idea of security included attempts to stop the blowing up of airplanes and other acts of real 'terrorism'.  What we have accomplished is the thwarting of accidentally spilling your water bottle mid-flight and keeping the elderly from making their flight with senseless 'extra security' checks.

Can you believe it?  I actually had thoughts of CIA type intellegence as the brains behind this agency.

As a scuba diver that carries my own camera and scuba equipment, I expect that I would be targeted for extra security checks.  I mean the stuff I carry in my carry-on (hoses, coiled strobe wires, camera housings, etc) could easily be confused as something malicious.  My video housing has 'blind spots' on x-ray that should be checked out.  But, on a recent trip I was walking through security, fully expecting my usual TSA anal probe.  I handed the TSA agent my plastic bag with toiletries, placed my carry-on (with all that equipment) on the x-ray belt.  Walked through the metal detector, and waited to be pointed to the special screening area while TSA ripped through my entire carry-on... BUT, that wasn't the case this time.  The TSA agent that had my toiletries, however, had found contraband!  Oh shoot!  He got on his walkie-talkie and in seconds, we had about 4 or 5 TSA agents around us.  Must have been REALLY BAD, because my carry-on made it through the x-ray machine and was waiting on the other side for me to retrieve it - this has never happened!  Did I accidentally forget to throw away the gun I had in my clear toiletry bag?  NO!  I had a half-used 4oz clear container of deodorant, and the TSA law clearly states "no larger than 3 ounces".  My bad.  The agents actually peered suspiciously at me and said they would be confiscating my deodorant.  I said "ok", grabbed my carry-on, and walked away.  This was the least hassle I have ever had getting through security, and it was because the deodorant distracted the agents, and they neglected ripping through my carry-on.  Brilliant.  A little misdirection saved me at least 10 minutes.

I just returned from a Shark Week 20th Anniversary Celebration in New York.  I had a 3oz bottle of shampoo (legal!) but since it didn't have "3 ounces" printed somewhere on the bottle, it was confiscasted.  My wife had the same 3oz bottle with a sticker that had "3 oz" typed on it - it got through.  Brilliant.  Next time I will use a Sharpie to write "3oz" on my bottle.

In a similar story, "TSA confiscates water bottle, misses bomb" (timesunion.com) the TSA failed finding bombs on 5 out of 7 test attempts.  In one test, the TSA opened a bag with a fake bomb and a water bottle.  They confiscated the water bottle - the fake bomb made it on the plane.  BRILLIANT!

In yet another story (Good Morning America), the TSA leaves for the day, shuts down x-ray equipment, and allows several bags through security unchecked.  Why?  Well, because TSA infinite wisdom tells us that terrorists would never try to sneak bombs past airport security during late night TSA off-hours.  Duh!  Terrorists sleep during that time!  Way brilliant.

I think that the SNL video below actually gives too much credit to the TSA.

Brilliant.